On Wednesday afternoon last week, my husband and I arrived in an unusually balmy New York, and being the cosmetic whore that I am, my first stop was....ta da....Sephora. For those of you that need hard evidence of my whoring, allow me to relay my conversation at the till that day:
Cashier: Where are you from?
Me: South Africa.
Cashier: Wow! I've AAAALWAYS wanted to go there.
Me: No kidding.
Cashier: You must be a make up artist?
Me: Huh?
Cashier: You bought so much stuff, no way it can all be for you, so you must be a make up artist. Am I right?
Me: Um. Yes. (presumptious little shit)
Cashier: Wow! You've spent so much, you qualify for TWO free gifts! Wow!
Me: (ok seriously numbskull - if you say 'Wow' once more, I will glue your mouth shut with my new Philosophy vanilla cake lip gloss)
That was Day 1. Fortunately, we only had another 2 days in the Big Apple, so the plastic damage was limited by something called daylight.
I have so much to share about those crazy 48 hours of consumerism, but my husband wants to watch Mad Men, so brevity is called for:
Banana Republic - Sorry to be crass, but fuck you Stuttafords. Seriously. It's the most awesome store, and you bring back 9 pieces of crap and charge us Prada prices for it. Go to hell. Banana Republic rocks rocks rocks, but I wouldn't touch it in SA.
Bloomingdales - Yawn. I'm sorry. I know many of you are mad for that place, but I found it an all-too-typical drag. A big-assed department store with the usual brands at unusually high prices. I want to pound the streets; not the escalators. That said, I did find two pairs of pumps: Juicy Couture and Calvin Klein - both quite reasonable. Lasted 20 minutes. Then I needed a Starbucks and some tar beneath my feet.
Century 21 - Do not go unless you have lots of energy, lots of patience, lots of upper body strength to wade through the rails and no social phobias whatsoever. It's basically a multi-story shithole with high-end brands at great prices. I loved it for kids clothes and their jeans selection is fab. You can live without it. I'm so not into shoving my way to a $100 pair of Sevens jeans. It's uncouth.
J Crew - A lovely store in its own right, but the treat is Crew Cuts, their kids' range. Be prepared to spend a bomb. Stylish offspring don't come cheap. The range is great: found boys' pants with little skulls all over them and a kiddies' cashmere cardigan. Very cool.
Abercrombie & Fitch - If you have a fantasy of being 21, hot, skinny, attending UCLA and dating the quarterback, A&F is La-la Land. Firstly, on entry, a supremely hot, abs-of-steel young man beckons you while he gyrates to cool dance music. He smells of youth and promise and twenty-something hormones and a hint of the A&F fragrance (which they pump through the vents like some sort of a nasal aphrodisiac). He asks if you want to take a photo with him. And then when you do, he looks at you like you're 21 and hot and skinny and dating the quarterback. And they ALL look like that. Every single A&F employee is The Hotness. Go there for their well-priced brilliantly fitting, cool T-shirts that make you look like you have toned arms. a slim waist and narrower hips...or just go there because it's nice to sniff the Abercombie guy in the entrance area. Up to you.
Zara - You know the deal. Wonderful place. Always a reliable source of fabulousness at prices that won't make Rand-earners projectile vomit from vertigo.
Pippen Vintage Jewelry - I only share this one because I love you. Pippen is a true find. A hole in the wall with absolutely exquisite vintage jewelry. I found $15 Italian mosaic hearts for necklaces and $5 diamante-encrusted house of cards pendants. I also found a Tiffany platinum necklace with a vintage diamond and emerald pendant, but fortunately, I was at the arse end of my retail frenzy and my reasonable-ness was returning. Check out her website and if you go to NY, go to her truly special (and super-organised!) store. You won't be sorry. http://www.pippinvintage.com/jewelry.html
Now Mad Men awaits.
Later. X
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Monday, September 13, 2010
How to feel like a Good Mom if you only have 20 minutes
Since I opened my new offices a few weeks ago and my life went from manic to OMIFUCKINGGOD, a number of unusual things have happened:
1. I have been inspired (probably because of time pressure) to set some boundaries with some family members that have relentlessly sucked the lifeblood out of me for too long. No more I say. NO MORE!
2. I have had a flirtation with tequila that rendered me rather disorderly, shaking my booty to Prince, barefoot on the DJ box, yelling for another 'voddi shot'. Can you spell 'trailer trash?'
3. I have completely ignored the nutritional needs of my children, so much so that I've been giving them each 3 Barney vitamins in the mornings to compensate. Nice.
Fraught with guilt because of the aforementioned triangle of sins, I decided to take at least one item in hand and make amends. I selected my children. (partly because I love them crazily and partly because we've run out of fish fingers and I have no choice now)
I needed a solution that would meet the following criteria:
1. Can be done now. (I'm all about instant gratification) This means no complicated recipes that require white truffle oil, seaweed or the breastmilk of a gnat.
2. Excellent ROI. One cooking session = Lots of eating sessions. (ie. must be suitable for home freezing)
3. Delicious. So delicious that both of them will eat it with gusto. I'm so over nagging.
4. Homemade and healthy, with a huge serving of veggies.
5. Can be actioned in 20 minutes or less.
Enter Jessica Seinfeld's 'Deceptively Delicious' cookbook, where the crafty little minx hides pureed veggies in children's meals. This evening, inspired by Jerry's naughty missus, I cooked the most insanely delicious macaroni cheese, FULL of pureed butternut.
Bite me Woolworths.
Now before you brand me a loser for getting excited about a healthy macaroni recipe, let me take you through the maths:
- no shopping - all of the ingredients were in my fridge
- 20 minutes from start to finish, including packing, labelling and freezing
- 8 meals for my children that I don't have to feel guilty about and that I don't have to cluck around like a cracked-out rooster to try and get them to eat
Post me if you want to recipe and I shall duly email. Or buy the book. You can use it to cook nutritious, yummy meals for your kids...or you can use it to bash yourself repeatedly over the head at 17h30.
Your call.
Bon appetit!
1. I have been inspired (probably because of time pressure) to set some boundaries with some family members that have relentlessly sucked the lifeblood out of me for too long. No more I say. NO MORE!
2. I have had a flirtation with tequila that rendered me rather disorderly, shaking my booty to Prince, barefoot on the DJ box, yelling for another 'voddi shot'. Can you spell 'trailer trash?'
3. I have completely ignored the nutritional needs of my children, so much so that I've been giving them each 3 Barney vitamins in the mornings to compensate. Nice.
Fraught with guilt because of the aforementioned triangle of sins, I decided to take at least one item in hand and make amends. I selected my children. (partly because I love them crazily and partly because we've run out of fish fingers and I have no choice now)
I needed a solution that would meet the following criteria:
1. Can be done now. (I'm all about instant gratification) This means no complicated recipes that require white truffle oil, seaweed or the breastmilk of a gnat.
2. Excellent ROI. One cooking session = Lots of eating sessions. (ie. must be suitable for home freezing)
3. Delicious. So delicious that both of them will eat it with gusto. I'm so over nagging.
4. Homemade and healthy, with a huge serving of veggies.
5. Can be actioned in 20 minutes or less.
Enter Jessica Seinfeld's 'Deceptively Delicious' cookbook, where the crafty little minx hides pureed veggies in children's meals. This evening, inspired by Jerry's naughty missus, I cooked the most insanely delicious macaroni cheese, FULL of pureed butternut.
Bite me Woolworths.
Now before you brand me a loser for getting excited about a healthy macaroni recipe, let me take you through the maths:
- no shopping - all of the ingredients were in my fridge
- 20 minutes from start to finish, including packing, labelling and freezing
- 8 meals for my children that I don't have to feel guilty about and that I don't have to cluck around like a cracked-out rooster to try and get them to eat
Post me if you want to recipe and I shall duly email. Or buy the book. You can use it to cook nutritious, yummy meals for your kids...or you can use it to bash yourself repeatedly over the head at 17h30.
Your call.
Bon appetit!
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Something's gotta give
It's been too long. Since last we spoke, Aubrey, our commitment-phobic hamster, has escaped twice. I have hired and trained two staff members, built very cool offices, scarified my lawn, replanted my herb garden, found my brother a place to live, taken on more work than I can spell, let alone handle, consumed approximately 150 cups of coffee and discovered that my cortisol levels (the stress hormone) are 6 x higher than normal. Shock me shitless.
Right now, I am sitting in front of my computer in my new office, looking onto my newly-scarified lawn and drinking cup # 151. I look older. Sleep sucks me in and aside from Ben's nightly yelps, I am certain that I die of exhaustion every night. This can't be sustainable.
That said, The Walnut Office now has an excellent team. All Type A's. All on the mad side of smart. Our offices are whimsical - functional and quirky and light. Our workload is heavy. My new Junior Strategist worked until 4am the other night. And it's a half day job.
I love it. I love working. I love managing hard-working people. I love creating. Solving. Writing. I love making a difference for clients. I love running a business.
But everything else has gone to shit. Despite the fact that my offices are at home, I have been around so little this month that Liam, my 4 year old, is attention-seeking non-stop. I'd like to believe that it has nothing to do with my workload; that it's just a phase, but I know him and we're deeply connected.
My husband has been amazingly supportive. Despite growing up in what would be considered a very patriarchal home, he is so proud of me. He's also an incredible source of input. He's run businesses and his commercial sense is excellent. We're off to New York in 2 weeks, which will be a good opportunity to re-connect (if I can get over the guilt of leaving the kids for a few days).
I know that I will find my groove again; my manic definition of 'balance'. I know that this office and these employees are the right thing to do. We do some really cool work for people and it was time to grow. For now, I'm going to try and just be in this frenetic space without too much judgment or guilt; choose my manic defense. My family will survive my distraction until it all settles.
So will I. I think.
Right now, I am sitting in front of my computer in my new office, looking onto my newly-scarified lawn and drinking cup # 151. I look older. Sleep sucks me in and aside from Ben's nightly yelps, I am certain that I die of exhaustion every night. This can't be sustainable.
That said, The Walnut Office now has an excellent team. All Type A's. All on the mad side of smart. Our offices are whimsical - functional and quirky and light. Our workload is heavy. My new Junior Strategist worked until 4am the other night. And it's a half day job.
I love it. I love working. I love managing hard-working people. I love creating. Solving. Writing. I love making a difference for clients. I love running a business.
But everything else has gone to shit. Despite the fact that my offices are at home, I have been around so little this month that Liam, my 4 year old, is attention-seeking non-stop. I'd like to believe that it has nothing to do with my workload; that it's just a phase, but I know him and we're deeply connected.
My husband has been amazingly supportive. Despite growing up in what would be considered a very patriarchal home, he is so proud of me. He's also an incredible source of input. He's run businesses and his commercial sense is excellent. We're off to New York in 2 weeks, which will be a good opportunity to re-connect (if I can get over the guilt of leaving the kids for a few days).
I know that I will find my groove again; my manic definition of 'balance'. I know that this office and these employees are the right thing to do. We do some really cool work for people and it was time to grow. For now, I'm going to try and just be in this frenetic space without too much judgment or guilt; choose my manic defense. My family will survive my distraction until it all settles.
So will I. I think.
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